Opening the Unthinkable

Nearing 30, something scary starts happening. You start doing the unthinkable, opening THE unspeakable. You knock on the forbidden door to the OTHER side, the following part of your life – your whole life. Up to this point you were playing with your plans and fantasies, completely unaffected by the finality of life, knowing something comes after. Peeping through to the other side was in the future, sealed by the lack of necessity. But now getting old, with your coping mechanisms at full throttle, nearly underneath your consciousness, creeping, there it comes.. your plans start stretching into the far future.. 30s..40s.. into the rest of your life. But the rest of your life is the one that contains your death, your end, after which there is no more..